Karte.XXX

I am 22 dee! it's like ..oh my god!!!

Yup! A year older .. Does it makes any difference? I don't really know myself .. THanks for all the messages and calls !!! Thank you so much pattayaz hahahaa .. miss ya all so much! Everything was abit different .. but i know i wasn't alone .. Thanks!

Oo0o yeah i ain't a good singer eventually hahaha .. but i enjoyed myself so much! THanks!

Karte.XXIX

She sings so sweet, sending tunes and melody that cools the soul, thank you so much to her without her, my life would be meaningless. How could I live without you :) million thanks to my 'always-be-there-for-me-computer' that plays Mr Jacky Cheung's music. Both of you are my life savers! Got some rest finally.

Due to last nite's lesson I woke up today and wanted so much to listen to this song hope you guys and girls out there can enjoy it as much as I do ...

p.s : I am not troubled just sometimes when solitude comes knocking on your door, it shakes the soul within ..

What's wrong with me?
Why do I feel like this?
I'm going crazy now

No more gas in the rig
Can't even get it started
Nothing heard, nothing said
Can't even speak about it
All my life on my head
Don't want to think about it
Feels like I'm going insane
Yeah

It's a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
It's too close for comfort

Throw on your break lights
We're in the city of wonder
Ain't gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must faulter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

Faded pictures on the wall
It's like they talkin' to me
Disconnectin' your call
Your phone don't even ring
I gotta get out
Or figure this shit out
It's too close for comfort

It's a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
I feel like a monster

Throw on your break lights
We're in the city of wonder
Ain't gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must faulter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum Disturbia

Release me from this curse
I've been trying to maintain
But I'm struggling
You can't go, go, go
I think I'm going to oh, oh, oh

Throw on your break lights
We're in the city of wonder
Ain't gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must faulter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It's like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain't used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia

Disturbia ! Wooo hooo !

Karte.XXVIII

INSONMIA!! DISTURBIA!!!

Mom has been nagging me bout why am I always sleeping late and all those kind of things, so being a good boy i planned to sleep early tonight, I was really tired after running around the whole day, physically I am totally exhausted but I really don't know why does my mind kept on spinning and thinking and thinking and thinking till I am so active I can't sleep. Gosh!Am I disturbed? I don't know Help is there a remedy to sleep?

I got up suddenly, hoping to look at the time should be around 4 or 5 am but it's not! It's only like about 145 almost to 2 .. gosh .. Time does not speed up when i need it to speed it's like crawling only! Just hope to get some sleep I don't mind where I sleep now as long as I can get one ... =.='

Karte.XXVII

This song .. once i heard and saw the lyrics .. it keeps lingering in my mind .. can't get it out .. maybe it expresses what i feel ..

Tried to take a picture
Of love
Didn't think I'd miss her
That much
I want to fill this new frame
But its empty

Tried to write a letter
In ink
Its been getting better
I think
I got a piece of paper
But its empty
Its empty

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

And I've even wondered
If we
Should be getting under
These sheets
We could lie in this bed
But its empty
Its empty

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

Oh oh
Oh oh
Oooooh
Oh oh
Oh oh

Maybe we're trying
Trying too hard
Maybe we're torn apart
Maybe the timing
Is beating our hearts
We're empty

We're empty
We're empty

Or will we end up getting hurt
Is this love a myth
So tell me are you in for this
There's so much more than we can see
More than you
More than me
It takes two to believe!

Maybe it's our first mistake
And baby that's alright
It's crazy how we lost ourselves tonight
Maybe it's our first mistake
And baby that's alright
It's crazy how we lost ourselves tonight
There's a reason why they say that we should give it time
But time is not enough
And that's the reason why when you're young you fall in love

And that's the reason why
When you're young you fall in love [2x]

Empty by The Click Five

Karte.XXVI

Of Laughter and Tears , Of Love and Hatred.

Just a fine line that separates 2 weirdest phenomenon that happens in our lives.

Based on what i wrote on top, come to think of it. It's rather true. When we're sad we cry am I right? But when we're happy we will say that we're so happy till tears fall .. so ain't that contradicting? Another reason to ponder is when you love a person, you'll hate that person as well because of all the things that you have done for him/her at the end of the day it doesn't turn out the way it should be at least it doesn't turn out the way we wanted it to be. Sometimes we just wanted to be cherished, cared and loved. But what is the definition of being cherished? Cared? and of all Loved?

As i said it's really a weird phenomenon. People laugh when their happy, but some even laugh when their sad. Like I said a fine line that separates between laughter and tears. To me, it's good to cry and shed tears at times. It proves that we still have a soul in us. We cry because our souls are tormented, we cry because emotions rule before us, we cry because we are human and not God. But crying is enough to relieve us, not doing anything stupid to harm ourselves physically. So to the first phenomenon, cry when you want to cry, express yourselves thoroughly because that's what we are as human beings. Without expressions or emotions we're just mere robots. The same concept applies to laughter. Laugh when you want to laugh. Laugh and smile always for we don't know when a person might fall into your laughter and want you to laugh always.

As for the second phenomenon, if I could define love then I think I can be a wealthy, but nope. I can't define love for its too well undefined. Based on physics, it's force and magnitude is infinite, based on chemistry its catalyst and reactions are infinite, based on computer logics, there's no logics we can't program love. based on mathematics and calculations, we can't measure love nor is there any SI unit for love .. so at the end of day it's just infinity. But like what i said earlier, there's only a fine line that separates love and hatred. Often after being so deeply in love it turns to hatred for one side or another felt betrayed eg, law of conservation of energy states that the total amount of energy in any isolated system remains constant but cannot be recreated, although it may change forms, e.g. friction turns kinetic energy into thermal energy. In thermodynamics. But ain't love supposed to be a good thing? how can it turn ugly? Maybe it's like LOTR where the elves such beautiful beings thru hatred will turn to ugly and hideous goblins. I think we should not ever have those kind of thoughts in our lives. Hatred is such a negative energy, if put to a certain amount it can be disastrous and hatred evolves a person. Therefore if there was once love , let i be love.Don't ever turn or evolved it to hatred. Love can be lowered or increased.. as i said it can't be measured but can be lowered to and infinite amount as it can also be increased to an infinite amount, but don't turn it into hatred.

Love turning into hatred is never like the law of conservation of energy because love is ruled based on emotions, In the world of emotions there's no specific law that states any theories by anyone. The only person that states the rules are us, ourselves. So be wise it controlling your emotions at times use logics to comprehend with emotions. If emotions rule too much, it's not a good sign because it always tend to loose control.

Karte.XXV

This phrase i got it from my friend's blog. Thanks Man! hehehe

“Love is patient; love is kind and envies no one.
Love is never boastful, nor conceited, nor rude; never selfish, not quick to take offense.
There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, its hope, and endurance.
In a word, there are three things that last forever: faith, hope, and love;
but the greatest of them all is love.”

It's stated there out of faith , hope and love, love is the greatest of them all. I think it's perfectly true, it's based on love, people give in to their guilt and be honest, it's through love that makes people cry , it's through love that makes people be patient and wait if i were to state i think the list will go on forever. The love that I am saying covers everything, friends, family, lovers and everything.

But many people misunderstood that love should always be blissful, where when a person meets love, it sweeps them off their feet and so on. To me love was never blissful or it can swept you off your feet, it's just based on movies. The actual fact is love comes with sacrifices especially unconditional. Love is never a business don't expect that when you have given out love you must have it in return because it will never will. It's either you stick to this concept or don't love. Love is hardship, where patience comes into play all the time, it takes time to really understand love or some might not understand at all. Love is not like fireworks because fireworks sparkles in the sky for a few minutes only, love is an everlasting emotion that always linger in our hearts. No one can replicate love or no one can define love. That makes love the greatest of them all for it comes with hardship, sacrifices, patience. The highest value where one human being can achieve.

For guys, if you really love your partner, set aside your ego, ego is nothing when you face your loved one. Give them tender and care as much as you can.

For girls, it's not guys want to lie to you always, sometimes they do that for you not to worry, beside if you truly love your partner, set aside your insecurities when you're with him.

Insecurities and egoism is the most common barrier that separates a couple.

Lastly, the highest value a person can achieve through love is setting one free. Love as I said is a sacrifice, loving someone does not mean you need him/her to be always there for you that's why it unconditional. Agony and pain will always be there if you brush aside both of them, there's always chances. What's meant to be yours will always be yours, what's not no matter how hard we try and force ourselves, it will never be. Don't loose confidence in yourself because of that.

Karte.XXIV

You've been a reason and a season to me. There's no guarantees that you'll be lifetime but I am glad and happy that out of that 3 stages, you've fulfilled my life with 2. Most of all, out of the 4 seasons we've been through all just that maybe we aren't able to been through more.
Thank You.

Karte.XXIII

An Ending Is Not Necessarily An Ending, Every Ending Is A New Beginning.

Well, first off my special sem just ended, there's been turmoil and turbulence during this special sem. At the start, it was hard to cope with due to the reason for us being too free. Free till there's so much time to think of nonsense. It's pathetic! Really but now it has ended already and all of us are glad that it's finally over. Special semester is over embrace yourself for a new long semester! Therefore every ending is a new beginning.

This special semester will be my most unforgettable special semester. I realized a lot of things, but through the realization i found nothing that i understood. Confusing eh? Yeah that's why my blog is called crazy philosophies. There are things which sometimes i think i can't find a solution to myself as well. Through so much thinking at the end of the day all i got was stucked. I always tell my friend that solutions are based on ourselves and mainly affected by our opinion. If you ask people it only adds to the support but at the end of the day it's yourself that makes the call. But to me I find that sometimes i don't have that courage to make that decision. Crap rite? Sometimes life can be easy, it's just that we think too much of other things that adds to the contradiction, which gives us trouble to make decisions. Lame right?

I do feel a bit astray lately. It's like I am scattered apart, a few pieces here, a few pieces there. Should need sometime to pick up those missing pieces and grab hold of my life again! Memories will remain deep in me, but it's time to move on. Every ending will be a beginning.

Karte.XXII

Appearance For A Reason , Season and A Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.. When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

Karte.XXI

This is what happens when Fuel keeps on increasing!
Enjoy the video I present you to me i think it's ideal Environment Friendly :)

Karte.XX

Global price of oil reaching US$200 (RM660) per barrell

Shall we as citizens prepare to face the fact that we would not be protected for long? PM says that there'll be no more increase in fuel prices for this year, note, this year only.. how many months to next year? How much more can the citizens be able to adapt to the shock of increasing of fuel prices? It's like slamming a rock down onto your face directly, what we earn every single cent is through hardship, sweat and worst some even with blood, with the increase of fuel, no matter how hard we try, like or dislike we still need to pay for our cars. Can't there be a solution to this fuel increase issue? If there is an solution be sure to introduce ASAP for we as citizens won't be able to withstand the shock much more.

Besides, we as a growing country we can't be burdened always with the issues that's going on in the world and we have the advantage of exporting oil. So in a way it's ridiculous we as a nation are burdened by the fuel increase issue. It's unhealthy for the nation and most important for the people.

Karte.XIX

"A lot of people enjoy being dead. But they're not dead really--they're just backing away from life."


I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult,
in order to accept the responsibilities of a 6-year-old.

The tax base is lower.

I want to be six again.

I want to go to McDonald's and think it's
the best place in the world to eat.

I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle
and make waves with rocks.

I want to think M&Ms are better than money,
because you can eat them.

I want to play kickball during recess and stay up on Christmas
Eve waiting to hear Santa and Rudolph on the roof.

I long for the days when life was simple.

When all you knew were your colors, the addition tables and simple nursery rhymes, but it didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know, and you didn't care.

I want to go to school and have snack time, recess, gym and field trips.

I want to be happy, because I don't know what should make me upset.

I want to think the world is fair and everyone in it is honest and good.

There are things in life where we often overlooked when we have been in this journey called life for so long that sometimes we felt bored and sucky, but reminiscing the times when we were young we actually forgot how beautiful life was .. so after reading, have some time to think about how young and innocent we once were, forget about the frustrations that we have daily for it will come tomorrow as well but memories like this only happens once in our lifetime, think about it and eventually you will feel relaxed and maybe there are solutions to every problem we faced daily.

Karte.XVIII

~Greatest journey is the distance between two people~

Often we could not complete this particular journey, being humans can be so naive at times don't really know what they want, don't really know how to think and most of all we just find a hole dig and hide and never to awake to face what obstacles that's ahead of us.

Distance between 2 people is really a hard road to travel, one must go through lots of hardship, courage, perseverance and patience. Think twice if we should start this journey, it's not just simple words or empty promises, at the end of the journey I am sure you'll be rewarded, but if stopped half way .. DEVASTATED ..

Karte.XVII

Love's like solitaire.. have you all tried playing solitaire? Well for me i am not a big fan of a solitaire but I have a friend who loves solitaire alot that she played till she won't sleep .. but that's not my point ..

After seeing her excitement in playing solitaire, I tried myself but it made me realised that love is like solitaire .. why i said so?

Well, in the beginning of the game we played we sure have a hope winning it. Like love in the beginning, we hoped it would last that replicates how a game ends which is winning but eventually during the process of the game we need to strategize our every movement think alot and try our hardest to win but eventually what ever the card that's been given it's fated whether we win or loose ..

Similar to love, sometimes it's just fated whether it's going to be a winning game or a loosing game of solitaire. No matter how hard we try, what ever the cards are given in the process of the game we know that we are going to win or loose no matter how smart we are.

So as we reflect onto us, some would just keep on trying and telling themselves that their going to win the solitaire but some knows very well that they are going to loose so they gave up before facing the cruel fact that they've lost. So it's all up to us to decide whether we should continue to lie to ourselves that we're winning or loosing.

Solitaire .. Brilliant Game

Karte.XVI

~~CARS ARE GOING SSSSSLLLLLOOOOOW!~~~

Aftermath of the hiked up price of fuel , I noticed that when i woke up every morning, I don't dare to step on the oil paddle so much. Maybe it's me only but i noticed a lot of people doing that.

So i guess the one of the reason government raised the fuel price is to reduce road accidents hahaha .. LAME

Karte.XV

CRAP CRAP CRAP CRAP!!!!

This is totally ridiculous!!!!! At first food price like rice, grain and all those essential needs have been increased price .. and now PETROL!!! and what's worst increase for 41% ..

Let me calculate how does a student that has an average about rm500 - rm600 going to survive ..
If he/she drives a 1.5 litre car and uses 1 full tank of petrol weekly .. then ... one full tank is rm98.00 hence times with 4 weeks .. it'll come up to approximately rm400 ..

So lets do some simple calculation , rm600 - rm 400 = rm200 .. with food price increasing .. how do you think students be able to survive? So are students are suppose to eat instant noodles daily just to survive .. then ok , we can live with that .. it's ok .. so the next future generation will eventually die at young age due to cancer for over eating instant noodles ... a round of applause for our great government that kills our future grads that's been so hard struggling outside !

How can we compare the oil price with other countries in south east Asia? We are an oil exporting country and yet we can't be subsidised more? It's fair for other country's citizen to pay for their oil price because they are importing oil but we are exporting and we're suppose to gain profit and not wanting the citizens to pay more .. gosh ... evthing increasing except salary ..
it's like citizens have to tie their bellies just to pay for the petrol Great .. !

Conclusion ..
Optimistically : We know very well that we Malaysians are great survivors thru this wave that caused a ripple effect to all of our Malaysian's life we'll make it through one way or another!

Pessimistically : Our lifestyle and the way we spend our money will change drastically, every single cent from our pocket must be spent carefully.

Karte.XIV

It may sound absurd , but don't be naive .. even heroes have the right to bleed .... Sometimes i do feel that way, being strong always can really cut you deep the heart when reality strikes ... and it keep cutting .. enjoy the lyrics below for it states what's in my mind lately ..

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
I’m just out to find
The better part of me

I’m more than a bird...i’m more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It’s not easy to be me

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I’ll never see

It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It’s not easy to be me

Up, up and away...away from me
It’s all right...you can all sleep sound tonight
I’m not crazy...or anything...

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
Men weren’t meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I’m only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
Inside of me
Inside me
Yeah, inside me
Inside of me

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
I’m only a man
Looking for a dream

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
And it’s not easy, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm...

Its not easy to be me

.... It's not easy .. to ....be ... me .....

Karte.XIII

Cheerz for the ever hardwork of Malaysians trying to unite our country where we won't longer exists based on individuals ... but as families and friends as well as brothers and sisters!!

Hold on brother hold on
The road is long. We’re on stony ground
But I’m strong. You ain’t heavy

Oh there’s a misspoken truth that lies
Colors don’t bind, oh no.
What do they know? They speak falsely.

Chorus:
Here in my home
I’ll tell you what its all about
There’s just one hope here in my heart
One Love undivided
That’s what it’s all about
Please won’t you fall in one by one by one [with me]?

Push back sister won’t you push back?
Love won’t wait. Just keep pushing on.
Yes I’m strong. You ain’t heavy.

Oh don’t you worry about that…
What we have the shadows can’t deny
Don’t you know it’s now or never?

Rap:
[Malay: TRANSLATED]
Years of fears and years of tribulation
The heart keeps searching for that endless devotion

[Chinese: TRANSLATED]
Hand in hand we’ll march like blood brothers
I speak for my people hope we’ll find peace forever

[Tamil: TRANSLATED]
May the road ahead quench my thirst for success
May the road behind echo a song of the blessed

[English]
So I will let it be known yes I feel it in my bones
No matter where I roam this is home sweet home
Sing!

Enjoy this song! People get it from www.youtube.com ... Here In My Home!!!